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Why Do You Feel Jealous About Her Sexual History? - The Man Up Show, Ep. 156

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Ask your private questions and get access to exclusive bonuses and coaching through our private Facebook Group. Join now: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/# For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has coached tens of thousands of people from over 87 countries to achieve happiness and success in their dating and love lives. Once a nerdy, skinny professor of Asian philosophy who couldn’t hold a conversation to save his life, David is now director of Aura Transformation Corp., and a world renowned dating and life coach. Dr. Tian has been featured in international media, including AXN, Cosmopolitan, Psychology Today, as well as co-hosting a radio show on national radio and a weekly dating advice column in a national newspaper in Singapore. Formerly a professor at the National University of Singapore, Dr. Tian is actively researching, speaking, and publishing in the areas of philosophy and psychology. The show, “Man Up: Masculinity for the Intelligent Man (http://www.auratransformation.org/blog),” is David’s way of helping as many people as possible enjoy empowering and fulfilling lives, while contributing to the global understanding of masculinity in modern times. In the show, he takes your questions posed in the Man Up private Facebook group (https://www.facebook.com/groups/manup...) and answers based on his experience coaching (https://www.auratransformation.org/co...) tens of thousands of students around the world for over a decade." Connect with David Tian here: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/david.tian.aura Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/blog/category/man-up/ Spreaker: https://www.spreaker.com/show/the-man-up-show-by-david-tian-ph-d Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/davidtianphd/sets/the-man-up-show-by-david-tian-phd Itunes: https://itunes.apple.com/ph/podcast/man-up-show-masculinity-for-intelligent-man-david-tian/id1356372719?mt=2 IheartRadio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/53-The-Man-Up-Show-By-28665066/ Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3kHYqOnkolIRC1epU4r5zH?si=dIh8YbNYTrW-p4M6L4WyRw Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd David’s also prepared 5+ hours of free video courses that reveal how to make your relationship passionate, how to make friends anywhere, how to talk to anyone, and a lot more. Click Here: http://www.davidtianphd.com/masterclass ***** Boom! Stop. I'm David Tian, PhD. And in this video, I discuss: why do you feel so jealous about her sexual history? Welcome to Man Up Episode 156. Masculinity for the intelligent man. I'm David Tian, PhD, and this is Man Up! Hi! I'm David Tian, PhD. And for over the past ten years, I've been helping hundreds of thousands of people in over 87 countries attain success, happiness and fulfillment in life and love, and here I am in Bangkok and just walking out from the Luxury Collection Hotel here. And it's really cool, because it's actually connected directly through the Sky Bridge to the BTS. So, just swinging around, you can see - I mentioned in an earlier episode how all of Bangkok... Well, not all, but a big part of Bangkok in this area, from Sukhumvit, down a couple stations that way and then starting up again about two stations over, starting from there and going about four stations, they're all connected by these Sky Bridges. Well, it's not bridges, it's like sky platforms. I forget the exact term of it. And then up above there, you can see it's called the BTS or above-ground subway here. So, it's pretty cool. Very comfortable living here, and this particular hotel connects right through to the subway. So, you can see the platform, I just walked all the way out. Very convenient. Anyway, this is not a hotel review, but I just wanted to show you that. And I'm going to show you the rush hour traffic here. One thing about Bangkok and Jakarta is the horrible traffic. This is, what? Like 5:30pm, so it's not even that bad yet. But everyone who has been out here know I'm talking about the horrible traffic. There you go, here are some more. Alright, so I'm going to go to a quieter area over here. "To read more, click here: http://www.davidtianphd.com/relationships/jealous-of-her-sexual-history/"
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Text Comments (11)
Dharmaboy (3 months ago)
David, it's amazing how debilitating this retroactive jealousy is. I am recovering and it's tough. My wife hasn't even been with that many men either. She let a very good and clean life. But jealousy and insecurities are very strong and poisonous traits to carry with you. thanks for this.
Leo Vince (6 months ago)
I just found out that my woman right now has a past relationship with my officemate that has a live-in partner and have 2 kids for 6 months. How do u overcome that? Her reasoning is that she was weak and she was pursuaded with the flowery words of the guy.
I answer questions in the Man Up private Facebook group. Join the community, and get your questions answered there: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/
Sundal Roy (7 months ago)
Sasykin S (9 months ago)
Hi man I just can’t comprehend another man being in the lady that I love it makes my knees weak! How come I don’t have a have any experience and she does. What’s your advice on that? I really want to be her first
Ankit Singh (2 months ago)
Lawrence Romero bro thanks
Mauriver River (2 months ago)
hi this happens to me but I really didn't care of being her first or cared about her past until she decided to tell me without me asking. what really made me care was when she compared me with this guy who was her first after us being together and telling me how everything happened and all the details that just killed me from the inside it still does after 5 year but I just try to ignore it but I just can stop remembering everything she told me any help?
Dharmaboy (3 months ago)
Marcus, I am recovering from this as well. What you said is 100% bangon. I still catch myself asking her small questions very sneakily. This is how some guys will do it. You will ask a question acting or trying to be innocent like " Man i never did this or that with a girl before. This is my first time ever i have felt like this or felt like that" All in the hopes she gives you the answer you want. I have to catch myself and bit my tongue. I am going through cognitive behavioral therapy to solve this and it works amazing. Guys please look into this. It helps...trust me. I now get some thoughts but I can control how i react to them and let them pass. sometimes it happens maybe once a day or sometimes never but they dont ruin me like they did a month ago when this all started. The male ego is a horrible thing because we try to show we dont care, and are strong etc. I would never wish this stuff on my friends or loved ones because it can grind your life to a halt. Hope you all recover and have a peaceful mind. Love to all the men that suffer this.
Lawrence Romero (5 months ago)
I came back to this video and saw my reply. But remember, "Complaining about yesterday today won't make tomorrow any better."
Lawrence Romero (8 months ago)
Sasykin S you just have to accept the fact that it happened, it's in the past, and it's YOUR fault for being jealous of her past. Not her fault. You may be feeling emotions of anger, fear, disgust, sadness, and jealousy. And don't worry man, you are not the first guy to be going through this and you won't be the last. And there are 4 things you need to do to get over this insecurity. 1. Remember, they are in her past for a reason. She sees something in you that makes her choose you over all those other guys. She could still be trying to get with her ex right now and not even have dated you, but she's with YOU. 2. Stop researching the topics of how to get over this jealousy and understand that if you LET IT, it will go away on its own with time. 3. Stop snooping through her messages and Facebook inbox from before you guys got together. It's not worth it, this will only make you feel WORSE and fall deeper into your pool of anxiety. Next time you feel like snooping through her stuff, go for a walk, play video games, go to the gym, watch a funny movie, do ANYTHING else that will get your mind off of doing that. The 4th and MOST important thing you have to start right away with no exceptions is STOP asking her about her past and all the sexual or nonsexual things she did with her exes or other men. This will make you seem insecure and needy, and the more you ask about it, the more likely of a chance she will leave you. Next time you feel like asking her something about that, bite your tongue and let it go. Talk about something which will make you guys happy, ask her how her day was or how the show was that she watched last night. I promise you will feel much better if you stop asking her questions about her past. And you must start doing these things right away, go cold turkey and stop snooping through her stuff, and asking her questions and researching this topic. Another note to remember: a girl may have done more sexual things with a past partner and done the craziest things, but that doesn't mean it's any better than what she does with you. Someone could have sex and not feel intimate at all, and that same person could kiss someone and feel more intimate than ever. *It doesn't depend on the actions , it depends on the person.* she's with you now and that means you're BETTER than ANY other guy she's had a past with, because she chose YOU. And it IS possible to get over this form of insecurity called "retroactive jealousy". You just have to go cold turkey on the things I mentioned above and quit asking about her past all together. She's YOUR girl now, remember that.

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